I’m not sure why I picked that particular moment—lying in the grass, sunshine ablaze on my eyelids—but I decided that this would be a great time to call Capital One.
I’ve been trying to clear out old shit (that’s the only word that applies) when it comes to money, to increase its attraction to me and my bank account. I’ve been wanting new writing/editing projects lately, and clearing out the old is a pretty good place to start when feeling stuck in the quicksand of broke.
I had been avoiding Capital One since April. That’s five months. Five months spent dreading the call, thinking I would have to muster up anger, self-righteousness, and immerse myself in the hard stance of: “Give me your higher up who can tell me yes!”
That’s such an unnatural state for me. I prefer bliss and harmony. I’m kind of a happy hippie.
I had been mysteriously collecting late fees, which was odd because I never use the card. What could the fees be on $0?
It has been a long time since high school, but I am pretty sure 0 x 0 = 0. Also, 0 \ 0 = 0. Other things like that. So, why was this different?