Let me be clear: Tamara Star is a wonderwoman wrapped up into a gorgeous, tall, sometimes shy, fiercely feminine package. She is also my friend; I believe in her deeply, and she’s created a truly special 40-Day Personal Reboot program just in time for the swift-moving, productive energy waves of the season. She’s put her heart and soul into it, and I wanted to share it with you through an exclusive interview with her.
Every day, Tamara shares her insights, personal stories and tips over at her Facebook page, Daily Transformations. She started it out of a genuine desire to share and help, not intending to turn it into a business—it now has 279,715 fans. In addition to her writing there, she now writes at her website and for The Huffington Post, elephant journal, The Good Men Project, MindBodyGreen, and many more.
Amy: Tamara, for those who don’t know you, what’s your meeting-someone-on-a-plane description of what you do and why you do it?
Tamara: I tell people that I’m a start-over strategist. I’ve been intuitive since birth and I spent 23 years in corporate America, so I act as a bridge between those two worlds. I help people see the blind spots that prevent them from living a life they love.
Tell me a little bit about how and why you created the 40-Day Personal Reboot.
The 40-Day Reboot was developed in my own journal 7 years ago when my life blew up. I was at a point where it was either: completely give up or come up with a game plan. So this reboot is very near and dear to my heart.
It’s for people who want a fresh start, have gone through a major life change like a breakup, or who are really tired of doing the same thing day after day and getting the same results.
I believe that the way we do anything is the way we do everything. If we fall down in one area, the others suffer as well.
That is so true. Walk me through what people will experience as they go through the 6-week process.
In 40 days we move through: our home environment from a feng shui energy clearing perspective, our body beliefs, our relationship to others, our relationship to ourselves, boundaries, our diet (which is really about nourishment and why we eat what we do), our limiting beliefs and stories we’ve taken on about ourselves, rituals, body treatments, centering exercises, and our beliefs and habits around money. It’s pure magic.
I think a lot of people feel the back-to-school energy of Fall, and I see a lot of options out there for “clearing the slate” and stepping back into our business lives. What makes your program stand out from other “reboot” or “fresh start” programs?
I created one of the original reboot programs, though there are a lot of similarly named ones now.
I’ve truly lived the program, and I bring my personal experiences and stories to it. Because of this, the women in it tell me that it feels very authentic—and also more booty-kicking than some of the other programs out there.
I’m also always reading the energy of the group. I believe that a lot of the people who do this program are called to do it the same time, because there is a common theme that presents itself. Once someone does the program once, they are grandfathered in. So even though it’s repeated twice a year, it’s slightly different each time.
Right. You’re not speaking from a place of: “I’m an expert and I have it all figured out,” but more, “I’ve been there, I continue to be there, and here is what has really worked for me and many other women.”
Exactly. And we don’t leave any stone unturned. I cover every aspect of life, boundaries, toxic relationships, etc.
What kinds of results have you seen from the program?
I’ve been so blessed to see women have major breakthroughs: women have saved their marriages, changed careers, one women realized she had an eating disorder, many fight their depression naturally by clearing the slate.
You do personal coaching as well. If you were coaching yourself, what would you say to Tamara of 10 years ago?
::laughter:: I would say: “Get over yourself, there’s nothing to fear, stop taking yourself so seriously and really go for it.”
Because in the end, all that matters is that we live who we really are—otherwise, we’re wasting our essence.
What are some of your one-word definitions of success?
My definition of success is living a life full of laughter and love, and knowing that every person I connect with is left better off than when I encountered them. If we can live our life like that, our life is a success.
I resonate with that; even as entrepreneurs we often stress ourselves out feeling like we have to build empires to change the world. It’s so much simpler if we can learn to recognize and appreciate how we can impact people’s lives in every moment.
Exactly. I believe that we have the power to change people’s lives every day, even by giving a stranger on the street a smile.
Beautiful. Tamara, I’m wondering what spiritual practices or tools do you use that keep you present and to those moments (and every moment)?
The same tools that I use, I teach in my program: I light incense to start the day and do a 10-minute morning meditation that grounds me and clears my chakras. I do yoga a few times a week, which keeps me sane. And I make sure to get out in nature at least 15 minutes a day without my cell phone. Even if it’s just a walk or sitting outside having lunch. It’s easier to do than most people realize—even on a nice day you can park your car at the furthest end of a parking lot and give yourself time to check in and ground when you’re walking to where you need to go. I also light incense at the end of the day to help transition.
Is there anything you ask yourself when you check in that helps you re-center when you feel out of alignment?
When I’m having negative emotions, I ask: “Is this even mine?” We might just be picking up energy stored in collective unconsciousness. In my 40-Day Reboot, we work with our emotional energetic boundaries. I give real-world practical advice, but I’m also intuitive, so I channel people’s guides and angels. I really work from both ends of the spectrum. Until we clear the slate on what we don’t want, we’re going to keep attracting that.
Live All of You is about fully showing up in your life. What does it mean to show up as Tamara?
For me, to live fully means to not care what anyone thinks, but to bring all of me to the table, no matter who’s in front of me.
I used to think that in front of a CEO, I had to act super professional, and in front of a yoga client, I had to act super open. I now know that I can bring all of that to the table, because there’s no other me out there, so I might as well rock it. I’m here now, so I want to bring all of me now.
What’s one thing you’re working on improving right now in your own life?
I’m learning how to be strong enough to stay vulnerable as I put myself out there more and more. It’s a constant struggle to stay open in the space of feeling more exposed and needing to not worry about being judged.
What are you doing when you’re feeling completely yourself, completely present?
Playing with my dog outside in the grass! Which usually consists of me holding her down and kissing her all over. ::laughs::
I love that nature is so important to you!
Yes! You don’t need to think about who you should and shouldn’t be when you’re out in nature—it’s impossible. You can just be.
What specific action do you take when you feel like you’re not being yourself to get back into alignment?
I close my eyes and take three super long deep breaths, in through the nose and out through the mouth. It calms the parasympathetic nervous system and brings me right into the present moment. Our monkey mind and limbic system can get out of control sometimes. Oh, and I scream in my car. ::laughs::
What do you think is the key to being and staying happy?
What always blows me away is that no matter what we do for work or whether we’re married or single, we all struggle with the same core issues that block us from happiness. And what’s so profound is it’s such a simple fix—it’s always the tiny things that make the biggest difference in our lives. I think the key is shifting those small things we allow ourselves to overlook.
How would someone know if they’re meant to take your 40-Day Personal Reboot program if they’re on the fence?
I always say, if you’re not sure if it’s for you, just close your eyes and ask yourself: What would it look like in 5 years if I do this program and what would it look like if I don’t? And most women will get a hit on it. And really, I suggest doing that with every decision in your life!
Tamara is such a blessing, and I highly recommend checking out her reboot program. Thanks for reading, and feel free to post your thoughts and questions in the comments.